Friday, April 29, 2005

The meaning of life

When I think about the meaning of life, I do not ponder how we came to be or why we exist. Rather, it is more along the lines of what it means to live and thrive in our daily lives. I came up with quite a simple thought/explanation in the quest to decipher the meaning of life and that is: to feel okay.

Is it really that simple? Am I reinforcing the theory of Occam’s Razor?
When I speak of feeling just “okay,” it is because being okay is the minimum threshold before feeling bad or poorly. Let’s face it, when we feel like crap, the rest of the world seems shitty, and it consumes our lives until we feel better or in my terms, “okay.”

As simplistic and naïve as the theory may sound, think about it. We strive to feel okay in our daily lives by taking care of our basic needs such as food, clothing, and shelter. We interact with others and seek out love, which brings us comfort and joy. All the products we buy are purchased to increase our well being in either a physical, emotional, or mental way. Everything we do, all our behaviors, are coordinated in a manner to make us feel okay and keep living.

It comes down to this: feeling okay is the balance between bad and good or sad and happy. It is the fulcrum, the baseline, the origin. Without it, we would not have a perspective, a reference, or a safe space to make sense of the world. It is quite simply, what it means to live.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

A cyber bitch slap

I’ve noticed that there has been instances of people who have been copying other people’s blogs and claiming them as their own. WTF? How hard is it to pull out sentences out of your own ass? That is sad that some people cannot even create their own original work. Do they not know what plagiarism is? Sheesh.

It’s all very, very sad. The anonymity of blogs does not make it okay to steal someone else’s published material.

Friday, April 22, 2005

Adult Angst

A while back, I got into a conversation with a colleague about being an "adult," and how crappy it can be. She and I had a lot of the same feelings and anxieties, and it gave me comfort in knowing that I was not alone and/or going crazy. She forwarded me one of these chain emails (which I usually hate), but it had a lot of things that hit close to home or said what I couldn't quite communicate. Anyway, I thought I would share this:

"Being Twenty-Something

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.

You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such a thing to you. Or you lay around and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out."

Thursday, April 21, 2005

A visit from the Cookie Fairy

I bought these bags of Mini Rainbow Chips Deluxe Cookies by Keebler for lunches that I bring to work. They are pretty good—similar to Famous Amos cookies but with M&M coloring chocolate chips. Just so you know, I am not 12; I just like having something sweet after I eat my main lunch. Besides, you can buy a box of a dozen packages in the grocery store for like five bucks.

As everyone knows, companies sell things by weight. Usually, I think I am getting less than what I am supposed to in the packaged food products I buy (especially chips), but today I was rudely awakened. When I went to open the bag, I noticed that the bag was filled to the brim with cookies. This was very strange since I was expecting 7-9 cookies. This bag definitely had more than double. So I did what any dork would do…I went into the mailroom and weighted the bag. It was supposed to be 1.4 ounces, but this bag weighed a little over 3 ounces!

Anyway, the point of this rant is to show that when companies sell things by weight, they lie!

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

A Whole New World

As stated previously, Alias has been one of my guilty pleasures lately. My life is very sad at the moment.

Although sad, the show has gotten me interested in new technologies that the government and other powerful bodies implement in the realm of security. Most people know of “common” biometric scans such as retinal, voice, or fingerprint verifications of identity. But I was shocked to recently learn of a biometric scan that analyzes your hand for the mapping of your veins and arteries. WTF?! That is crazy. What will they think of next?

This also sparks a related topic on the usage of currency. With the technology boom, everything is becoming automated. Every place I know where you can buy something takes credit/debit cards (even fast food restaurants), thus eliminating the need to carry actual cash. People can pay their bills online and manage their money online as well. We have things like direct deposit; special cards that have a balance on them for riding the subway, going through tolls, or even playing video games. The options are staggering with more to come as we progress into the future. Money now floats in cyberspace instead of jingling in your pocket.

Plausibly within my lifetime, the notion of biometric scans might crossover into the realm of currency in which your bank/money is linked to your retina, voice, fingerprint, veins, or some other authentication method to be invented. Life would be free of wallets since the need to carry identification, credit/debit cards, and actual cash would be obsolete.

The ideas and possibilities are both frightening and fascinating. But the thing I find sickly amusing is that victims of identity theft would be highly noticeable upon physical appearance. The market for glass eyes, manufactured voice boxes, plastic/reconstructive surgeries, and prosthetic limbs might potentially boom exponentially. Maybe now is the time to invest in those stocks.

Tune in for another episode of Sick, Sad World.

Monday, April 11, 2005

Must be a Monday thing…

in which I blog. Really it is denial that another work week has begun.

I spent a good portion of this weekend watching season 2 of Alias instead of catching up on sleep. I think I might need a bit of a break or watch fewer episodes consecutively in one sitting. I know I have taken things to a scary place when I walk through the woods with my dog as quietly as possible, pretending to be some sort of spy/agent. To top it off, I had my trusty Benchmade blade and my cell…you can never be too careful near a murder capitol. But yet, I still attracted some freaky old guy on a bike. Good thing my dog is sooo vicious and went up to him to be pet and loved. 19 lbs., brown and white, and not a mean bone in her body. Did I mention she thinks she’s a cat? (my gf and I have categorized it as, SID = Species Identity Disorder, not to be confused with SIDS = Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). Cute and lovable, but not the best protection, so I had to be prepared.

But it was really nice getting outside with the great weather we have been having. It all made me realize I really want a hammock. But first, I think it would be more appropriate to want my own yard with some trees to tie the hammock to. Or I could invest in a self-standing hammock to accommodate apartment living better. I have also seen hammock swings (MKD’s aunt has one), but they seem more kinky than relaxing.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

It’s not an obsession; it’s a mild preoccupation

I have just acquired season 2 of Alias and began watching it last night. Fantastiko has been generous enough to lend me the DVDs and is responsible for getting me hooked on the show. Now that season 4 is airing on Wednesdays, it is interesting to see how a lot of the old characters keep on resurfacing. But really, the only character that matters is Sydney Bristow (Jennifer Garner). Super hot/smart, kicks major ass, and makes a life of espionage seem alluring and spectacular.

Another shameless plug would have to be for The L Word. After all, we did upgrade to digital just for Showtime and look forward to every Sunday. Even though lesbians on the show do not exist in real life, it is still enjoyable to watch and ogle. But maybe I am wrong and the LA gay scene is really that racy and sexy. If that is the case, then I know quite a few people who might become west coast inhabitants as a result.

I used to think that both shows were very different and therefore I could consider my TV tastes to be extensive. But the common theme of eye candy and hot action debunks that notion.

Monday, April 04, 2005

My eyes are being held open with paper clips

Insomnia is a bitch and occasionally strikes (conveniently) on nights with work the next day. But I can honestly say that last night had other factors contributing to the lack of Z’s rather than happenstance.

First off, I screw my schedule up on the weekends by staying up until the wee hours of the morning, and then sleeping in until the late afternoon. I am reverting back to my nocturnal ways, and the holy man is not around to change that again. Secondly, my dog had some MAJOR gas and kept farting all night in intervals of 3 minutes. It would not have be so bad if she slept at the foot of the bed, but she was feeling overly needy and therefore sleeping on MKD’s pillow. The sound of rapid machine-gun air originating from the dog’s ass is never a good thing. Then to top it off, pre-period stomach foo had me super uncomfortable.

Yay for Monday. Resisting the urge to pull a George Costanza.
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