Firsts

The last post was so bitter. This one won’t be. Maybe. We’ll see.

So I got my first parking ticket EVER! I have been driving for over 13 years and was always lucky enough to avoid these fuckers. But alas, my luck ran out and I got a $40 one yesterday. I was running late for a CPR class at the hospital and parked on a residential road next to the hospital since there was no parking. [Don’t even get me started about the parking situation at the hospital…it is something that frequently rises my blood pressure.] Apparently, you need a permit to park on the road. I threw caution to the wind and crossed my fingers and hoped for the best. But lo and behold, a yellow envelope was under my wiper when I returned. A parking violation on my NEW!!! car.
I love this car. It’s my third baby. I had been shopping around for about a year and finally got the 2009 Honda CR-V in green tea. With twins and all their crap, getting a bigger car made sense for convenience and safety. Squeezing everything into a Nissan Sentra seemed really cumbersome and then there was the problem of where the dog would go. But now, space or safety is not an issue. And it gets the same gas mileage as my Nissan Altima that I traded in. Go figure.

I had tested the Subaru Forester, Nissan Rogue, and Acura RDX as well as researched all the other crossovers and mini-SUVs. But I kept coming back to the CR-V. So far, I really love it. My first new car! I can’t wait to have my babies in it.

The rough road continues

At 28 weeks and 2 days, our twins Violet and Leo were born. They are in the NICU for a very long time and things are very difficult. We thought the pregnancy was bad, but this is much worse. I found this forum with a compilation of sentiments that hit the nail on the head for me.

• Thank you for the congratulations but please don't pretend that everything is wonderful right now and I should be a glowing new mother.


• Don’t tell me how it’s ‘no big deal’ and everything will be fine because people have preemies all the time and they are just fine.


• Please don't tell me how you know of this other preemie who's now 18 and 6 feet tall and completely healthy.


• Please don't compare my baby to other preemies you have known. Maybe I'm the only one but even the positive stories bugged me because I wasn't sure my son was going to be one of them.


• Don't tell me how lucky I was to have my babies at the hospital so I could recover and catch up on sleep. There is nothing more in this world I wanted then to have my babies with me at all times. There is absolutely nothing 'lucky' about having babies in the hospital.


• Please don't continually ask me when my baby will be coming home. I have no idea.


• Please let me know if you are sick. If I get sick, I can't see my baby, so I don't want to risk it. If you are sick at all, please do not come and see my baby.


• Don't pester me to see photos of my baby in the NICU. She is naked and in pain and it hurts her dignity to be stared at and gawked over.


• Please don't ask questions I can’t answer, like will my baby ever be "normal."


• Don’t give me a hard time because I didn’t tell you details about whatever was happening. It was hard enough for me to understand and discuss with my DH.


• Don’t keep pestering me for answers. Don’t say- But you said she was doing good. Guess what, that all can change in a second which is why they call it an emotional roller coaster.


• Don't ask me what I need. I don't know what I need.

This is my 200th post. Yay me.

Where to begin?

As many of you know, MKD is in the hospital for the rest of the pregnancy. In a nutshell, MKD’s body does not want to be pregnant and we are fighting hard to keep the babies in. So we have been fighting since March 2nd. It has been a long, hard, and uphill battle. I don’t think either she or I have ever been this stressed out. I got two periods this month from all the stress, which is highly unusual for me since I get a period about every 36 days.

We are currently at 27 weeks. And MKD’s cervix has shortened to 7 mm, threatening to rip a stitch. So we fight for each day which saves our babies double that time in the NICU. I have to yield to the fact that we never got to do all those things we wanted to before the babies came, have less control over MKD’s diet, and no say what drugs are getting pumped into 3 systems.

There is so much to say on everything that has happened, yet I find I have nothing to say. For once in my life, this is something I care not to overanalyze or think about too much.

Because every parent does it

I am embarrassing my son. Yes, it is before he is born, but whatever. He brought it upon himself by not staying still and flipping around everywhere so this was the only picture we could get of him. He has to learn that his actions have consequences. So here is his penis for the entire world to see:

I am going to be such a great parent.

My girl was as pleasant as ever, which was unusual since she is usually quite persnickety. I swear she is smiling here:

Or has gas. Probably just gas since MKD cannot open her mouth without burping and farts every time she bends over. The unfortunate time was bare butt in my face. The fact that I still love her and find her sexy means it is real love.

Happy Dance!

I am happy to report that at our 18-week appointment, MKD and I found out that Baby A is a girl and Baby B is a boy!!!

We both are thrilled that we will experience raising both sexes. The “at the same time” bit is a kinda intimidating, but we will get through it. Maybe. Hopefully. Arg.

But yay! Strangely enough, a lot of people thought we were having a boy and a girl, especially MKD. She knew which was which too! Crazy.

So far, these babies have made us so incredibly happy and they are not even born yet! Not to mention the deep love we already have for them. Having a baby really does change everything.

That’s my baby! Er…babies!

At the 12 week ultrasound, MKD and I got to watch our babies on a huge LCD screen. We were shocked at how much they looked like actual babies and no longer nebulous blobs anymore. For over a half hour, we watched them move around and generally be awesome and cute (my genes after all!). MKD said they looked “Asian,” which made her happy because she desperately wants Asian-looking babies with hair that sticks up. I prefer white babies, but unfortunately the likelihood of having a blond hair/blue eye baby is pretty impossible.

Out of all the possible combinations of twins, my least favorite is girl-girl (way too much estrogen in the house including the pets). We are really hoping for boy-girl so we can have the experience of raising each considering our baby-making quest has been completed in one fell swoop (unintentional, really…who knew 2 frozen embryos would take?!). But I am really hoping for at least one boy to carry on my family name. I hate that this is the way it rolls, but it is what it is--a stupid sexist world. I am the last in my family to have the last name as my parents had 3 girls and my dad was the only boy in his family. So I am the closest thing to a son they ever got and was lucky enough to marry a wonderful woman who hyphenated her last name so our family will all have the same last name. These twins will be the 6th generation in the U.S.

Soon, we will find out the sexes. So far, Baby A seems to be a lot like me: shy and introverted. It was hard to get a decent picture of Baby A:

But the patient technician finally caught the little bugger!

Reminds me of myself since I refused to have my picture taken from age 11 to age 21.

Baby B is more like MKD: gregarious and extroverted. Getting a picture of Baby B was no problem at all as this baby wanted to be seen!

We can’t wait to see them again and love them so much already. MKD’s pregnancy has been pretty damn rough to say the least, but the end result will override all the bad days.

Letting the cat out of the bag

We're pregnant!!!

Currently at 14 weeks and 6 days :)

Did I mention with TWINS?!!!!!!!